Inventions Archives

As a content creator for FlexTrades, it’s my pleasure to present a blend of humor, snark, and frustration with the top 10 worst American inventions of the past decade. These gadgets and ideas make us wonder, “What were they thinking?” Let’s dive in.

1. The Juicero (2016)

Inventor: Doug Evans

Why It’s Bad: Imagine paying $400 for a juicer that requires Wi-Fi to function, only to find out you could achieve the same result by squeezing the juice packs with your bare hands. It’s the ultimate symbol of Silicon Valley’s knack for solving problems that don’t exist. Spoiler alert: it didn’t last long, but the memes will live forever.

2. Google Glass (2013)

Inventor: Google X (now X Development LLC)

Why It’s Bad: Ah, Google Glass—the gadget that made you look like a cyborg and alienated you from polite society. This wearable tech was supposed to make us all feel futuristic but ended up being an expensive way to invade privacy and get weird looks. If you wanted to be labeled a “Glasshole,” this was your golden ticket.

3. Hoverboards (2015)

Inventor: Shane Chen (original design)

Why It’s Bad: Hoverboards were the must-have gadget that promised to make us all look cool while zipping around town. Instead, they made headlines for spontaneously combusting and sending users flying. Banned from airlines and sidewalks alike, these rolling fire hazards turned a hot trend into a literal hot mess.

4. Samsung Galaxy Note 7 (2016)

Inventor: Samsung

Why It’s Bad: Samsung’s Galaxy Note 7 was the explosive device you didn’t want in your pocket. With batteries prone to catching fire, it was more likely to land you on a no-fly list than help you multitask. The recalls and bans turned this “must-have” gadget into an infamous pyrotechnic display.

5. Amazon Fire Phone (2014)

Inventor: Amazon

Why It’s Bad: Amazon’s Fire Phone had all the gimmicks and none of the substance. It boasted 3D visuals and a dedicated button for Amazon shopping, but lacked essential apps and usability. It’s a classic case of trying too hard to be different and ending up on the clearance rack.

6. Theranos (2003-2018)

Inventor: Elizabeth Holmes

Why It’s Bad: Theranos promised to revolutionize healthcare with just a drop of blood. Instead, it delivered one of the biggest frauds in Silicon Valley history. Faulty tech and deceit put patients at risk and turned its founder into a cautionary tale about the dangers of unchecked ambition.

7. Oombrella (2016)

Inventor: Wezzoo

Why It’s Bad: The Oombrella was marketed as a “smart” umbrella that could notify you of weather conditions. Apparently, checking your phone was too much effort. It was an overpriced, over-engineered gadget that solved a non-existent problem. Thanks, but I’ll stick to my regular old dumb umbrella.

8. Quibi (2020)

Inventor: Jeffrey Katzenberg and Meg Whitman

Why It’s Bad: Quibi aimed to change the way we consumed media with short, mobile-focused videos. Despite a high-profile launch, the lack of compelling content and the audacity to charge for something we get for free on YouTube led to its rapid demise. It was a billion-dollar idea that flopped faster than its 10-minute episodes.

9. Kohler Numi Toilet (2018)

Inventor: Kohler

Why It’s Bad: The Numi is a toilet that costs over $6,000 and comes with features like a heated seat, foot warmer, and built-in speakers. While it might be the throne of your dreams, most people found it ridiculously overpriced for a place to do their business. It’s a royal flush of money down the drain.

10. Jibo Robot (2017)

Inventor: Cynthia Breazeal

Why It’s Bad: Jibo was designed to be your friendly home robot. Despite its charming personality, it couldn’t do much beyond turning its head and making small talk. For its hefty price tag, you’d expect a lot more functionality. Instead, it quickly became a fancy paperweight with a cute face.

That’s a Wrap

And there you have it—the crème de la crème of American ingenuity gone awry. These inventions remind us that not every idea is a winner, and sometimes, even the best intentions can lead to the most spectacular failures. Here’s to hoping the next decade of innovation brings us fewer flops and more triumphs. Remember, folks, if at first you don’t succeed, maybe check if your invention really needs Wi-Fi. Until then, we’ll be here, ready to laugh at the next big flop.

This week Americans celebrated the 246th birthday of our country. We wanted to pile on by celebrating ten of the greatest inventions the U.S. has contributed to the world. Some are big, some are simple, but each one made life a little easier, a little faster, or a whole lot better. Here are our picks, in no particular order.

Bread Slicing Machine

America may not have invented sliced bread, but the bread slicing machine was all ours. Otto Frederick Rodwedder, a jeweler from Iowa, spent more than a decade perfecting his design. It finally hit commercial production in 1928 and changed the way we eat forever. To this day, every new innovation is still compared to the “best thing since sliced bread.”

The Internet

In 1969, researchers working for the U.S. Advanced Research Projects Agency sent the first host-to-host message between UCLA and Stanford. That single data packet was the start of something massive. Today, more than half the world is online, and the internet adds trillions to the global economy every year.

Global Positioning System (GPS)

Approved by the Department of Defense in 1973, GPS was designed to synthesize the best elements of existing satellite navigation systems. It became fully operational in 1993 and has changed the way we navigate — on land, sea, and air — ever since.

Post-It Notes

Thanks to a happy lab accident by 3M chemist Spencer Silver, and a clever idea from his colleague Art Fry, the Post-It Note was born in 1974. Originally used to mark hymnal pages during choir practice, it went on to revolutionize how we leave reminders, plan meetings, and stick grocery lists to the fridge.

The Telephone

Scottish-born Alexander Graham Bell was living in Massachusetts when he patented the electric telephone in 1876. Three days later, he made the first phone call: “Mr. Watson – come here – I want you.” With that, the world got a little smaller, and communication changed forever.

The Airplane

Bicycle mechanics Wilbur and Orville Wright were obsessed with flight. On December 17, 1903, in Kitty Hawk, North Carolina, they launched the first successful powered aircraft. Every plane since has borrowed from the core principles they proved that day.

The Light Bulb

While many contributed to the invention of electric light, Thomas Edison is credited for creating the first fully functional and commercially viable light bulb in 1879. His system changed how — and when — the world worked, slept, and gathered. It quite literally lit the path to modern life.

Interchangeable Parts

Before mass production, everything was made by hand. Eli Whitney changed that by developing interchangeable parts, a system he proved in the early 1800s with a government contract for 10,000 muskets. The idea paved the way for the assembly line and modern manufacturing as we know it.

Plastic

European chemists made the first plastics, but it was American inventor Charles Goodyear who unlocked their potential. He patented the vulcanization process in 1844, allowing plastics to become durable and commercially viable. Every industry we know today — from packaging to medicine — has been reshaped by plastic.

Moving Pictures

In 1890, William Dickson, an assistant to Thomas Edison, introduced the Kinetograph, one of the first motion picture cameras. By 1892, he’d helped create the Kinetoscope, the world’s first movie projector. Two years later, America began public screenings, launching a storytelling industry that would dominate the globe for more than a century.